A Mommy Hug

It's days like today that I need a Mommy hug.  I would like nothing more than to lay my head in my Mom's lap and let her play with my hair, tickle my arms, and rub my ears.  (And yes, I know the ear thing is wierd, but it's something she has done forever and it now brings me comfort :)! )

The past few days have been tough.  I've been fighting a cold and have had some problems with my VPN-which without, I can't get on the internet; not a big deal at all, but anoying.  Once all the computer mess was taken care of, I contacted my travel agent about changing my return date.  She does it, getting way too much of my money in the process, and does it wrong!  She has the 2nd leg leaving before the first one.  Try to figure that one out.  I tell her and she says, "Oh, we need to change the second flight to the next day.  I can do that for you, for an extra $226 fee."  Really!?  You mess up and want me to pay for it!?  Awesome. 

So, I turned off my computer and went to a foreigner friend's home for game night.  It was just what I needed.  I won Settlers of Catan and was awarded 'The Golden Hexagon'.  Be very impressed!  Then I lost terribly at 'Bonkers' but it was a lot of fun and laughs.

Now I'm off to email my wonderful travel agent again.  Hopefully this time goes over a little better.  Either way, I will be flying into DFW on Sunday, May 29.  I can't wait for a Mommy hug :)!

Random

I went to a local friend's home today for lunch and it was AMAZING!  Her sister decided I should learn how to cook Arab food, so they invited me to come back tomorrow.  Cooking lesson #1 starts at 11 am with selta, bread, and bisbas.  I can't wait!  I'll let you know how it goes :).

On a different note:

I have the best boyfriend in the world.  He makes my heart happy-I get giddy just thinking about him.  Our morning Skype dates make my day, everyday.  Just thought the world should know that!

I  love you, Tristan!

(And I miss you.)

Dependence

I'm a pretty independent person.  I tend to do things my way, even if it's not the best or easiest.  I've been this way my whole life.  Some call this being hard headed; maybe I'm a little of both.  (If you want stories, you'll have to ask my parents.  I refuse to incriminate myself.)  Independence can be a good and a bad thing. 

I love to travel: the adventure, new cultures, meeting people, beautiful sights, and even trying new foods.  Being independent has let me see the world: and it is a beautiful place.  Independence has also allowed me to be comfortable with myself.  There are so many people who can't handle being alone; I, on the other hand, find it thrilling.  Don't get me wrong, I'm a people person.  I love a crowd and a party; but there is something beautiful about the times when it's just me. 

But-and there's usually a but-when it comes to my relationship with God-trusting Him completely-I get in the way.  I have the "I can do it by myself" mentality.  It just can't work that way.  Being where I am and doing what I do, people think I have this rock solid faith.  It's easy to let everyone think highly of you: and it's very easy to get a big head.  All the while, the truth is: everyday is a faith struggle.  You don't get this amazing relationship and trust in Christ just by moving to a foreign country.  If only it were that easy. 

"Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time." ~Oswald Chambers

He is doing great things through me here.  BUT: nothing can compare with what He's doing in me.  I'm pretty sure the biggest thing that is going to come out of this chapter of my life is learning how to depend on Him alone.  I think that He had to take me away from everything that made me feel comfortable to show me that I need him in my everything.  I'm learning how to be deliberate to let Him have control of my life: my thoughts, words, and actions.  Sometimes this is a scary place to be.  It's hard to be vulnerable and it's hard to lose foolish pride. 

Being independent isn't a bad thing; but being solely dependent on Christ is the best thing.

"When you bow down before the Lord and admit you dependence on Him, He will lift you up..." ~James 4:10 

I want to be dependent on Christ so He can get the glory, and Him alone.  My prayer is to lose myself in the beauty of Christ.